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#EndTheStigma #stopthesilence #AA #sober #sobriety #recovery #rehab #alcoholism #12step #addiction

Hi, my name is Dom and I’m an alcoholic.  My sobriety date is July 13th, 2012.  That was the last day I had any alcohol; I checked into detox that night.  By the time I was actually checking in, it had been almost five hours since my last drink – the facility was almost two hours from my home and the check-in process took a while.  Although it had been almost five hours, I still blew a 0.2.  The nurse doing my intake mentioned their limit is 0.3, and if someone blows that high they are immediately sent to the ER via ambulance.  It makes me wonder about what my blood-alcohol level was earlier in the day (I don’t remember how I even got home earlier).  As I struggled through the check-in, I remember getting the shakes as the alcohol left my system, worrying so much about going into DTs, crying a lot, and being scared.  In the months leading up to my check-in to recovery, I was consuming at least a fifth of 100 proof, or higher, of alcohol per day.  I started my morning with a healthy swig or three from the bottle I kept hidden in my side table, and continuously visited said bottle throughout the day.  I would eventually pass out sometime in the afternoon, barely eating during the day because food would hinder the effect I was aiming for.  If I started getting low on my secret, hidden stash and was not able to head to the store, I would drink mouthwash and occasionally cough syrup.  I usually drank mouthwash a little each day anyways to help hide the smell of alcohol on my breath…never mind the fact it was coming out of my pores like there was no tomorrow.  I was definitely to a point that I was ready for help and was so tired of drinking, not remembering, missing out on life due to blacking out daily, not feeling well, and generally not giving a shit about myself.  What I was not ready for was facing life and reality; however, with time, healing, and a lot of work, I am still facing life and reality sober after more than four and a half years.  I realize I can do this, and it can be done.

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